We’re Goin’ to the Candy Shoppe Tomorrow!!!Posted: August 1, 2011
This really (*really*) wise woman told me (probably the best advise ever!! and I have read a lot of parenting books!!) that your children will live up to (or down to) the expectations you set for them. Soooooooooooo true!! A really wise pastor and doctor told me I need to raise mine 🙂
So there I went setting higher and higher expectations but the results were far from what I was looking for. This could be for any number of odd factors at the homestead right now but I really felt a sense that it was lack of encouragement that was missing.
I came across a blog that inspired me to do a chore chart thing that encouraged them with star stickers. A nickel for every star. At first I just bought the Melissa and Doug one but to my (YAY!) surprise…my kids were capable of so much more than that one held. But since my kids really don’t get the “money” thing yet..and, well, let’s face it…mamma never has any 🙂 I made our own incentive.
I bought a package of star stickers and once they get all the stars from one sheet onto the chart then they get (insert whatever you decide here)
I added things like “get dressed”, “brush teeth” for 2 reasons. 1. Obvious hygenine reasons 🙂 but 2. Because it starts the day off with them getting stars for something easy and something they pretty much have to do.
Then I threw in real “chores” that they would do randomly but this made them more of a responsibility. Things like “set the table”, “clear the table”, “put your laundry away”, “pick up playroom”, “take out garbage” and taught him a new chore of “cleaning the toothpaste off the sink and wiping your pee off the toilet”. See…win-win!
And one that incorporates us spending time together and doing something we value…”Scripture memory”. He has memorized 8 so far and mamma was no dummy when she chose to start with “Children, obey your parents for this is pleasing to the LORD.”Col 3:20 and
“Blessed are the peacemakers for they shall be called sons of God.” Matthew 5:9 and
“Do all things without whining or complaining.” Philippians 2:14
Because then we can use them throughout the day.
For example…”Jackson, go pick up the playroom, please.”
Jackson: I don’t waaaaaaaaaaaaant to
Me: Do all things without whining or complaining 🙂 🙂
Okay so my kids are probably going to figure out how to shoot me soon but hey…it worked this week 🙂 even tonight…Jackson was yelling at Ally to give him back something and I said “A” and he said “A soft answer turns away wrath” and then I said something like “that’s right…so try asking her nicely” and he did and she gave it back. YAY…but you still see why my kids are probably going to grow up rolling their eyes at me!! HA!
Anyway…and what I loved most is that I put things on there like “using manners” and “having a helpful spirit” that way they can get them all day long for doing things that I loooooooooove and by showing them that most of the stars are on those…I hope to be showing them the importance of those characteristics over plain ‘ol chores and daily tasks. They get excited to do them and it is sooooooo nice when they do. It literally took us 10 min. to sit down for dinner becuase it was like “oh ally i will get you some water. would you like me to pull out your chair. mom can i get you a napkin. would you like something more to drink. is there anything i can do to help”
okay this was supposed to be a quick post….
So anyway…write out some things like this (i stole the idea of using paint swatches) and stick it on paper, put it in a paper protector sleeve and hang it up.
Give the kids incentive. This week ours was…once you get all the stars on the chart you can choose candy store, Baskin Robbins or Sonic root beer floats.
They can use good manners and helpful spirit all day and have it filled in one day. Oh and what a lovely, lovely day that would be…one in which i would glaaaadly top with ice cream…everyday!! It took us 4 days to fill it up. Or try starting with “get one row of stars or all the blue and green stars…”
Next, we’re working toward a “how to make paper airplanes” book he has had his eye on….
Well…I had to share quick before it went kaput and i had to admit failure…again 🙂
Hope it helps you or your family for a week or two, too 🙂
One thing I was careful *not* to do was put things on the chart that are rules or required or prohibited, anyway…like they don’t get a star for *not* hitting each other 🙂
Oh and if you like the idea of scripture memory but don’t know where to start. There is a cute book called My ABC Bible Verses that has great ones with a story that coincides with each one.